The Babylon Bee – May 15, 2020
My cmnt: This is more than just bogus and sad – this is bizarre. Joe Biden is obviously suffering from senile dementia. We are not blaming him for losing his cognitive faculties we are blaming the democrat/media establishment for shamelessly using him for their own ends. This is the 1979 film Being There and Chauncey Gardner coming to life. The dems are actually going to try to elect a completely incompetent, incoherent boob to the office of the presidency of the United States! I mean Clinton the First was a boob and a serial sexual predator (and our first black president), Clinton the Second was physically decrepit and suffering from seizures (and going to be our first female president), and B. Hussein O. was an out of touch, distant, narcissist who surrounded himself with women who ran the show (and our first Muslim, community agitator president) – but all three of them could give a good speech and read a teleprompter. If Biden should be elected he will be our first puppet president and therefore more dangerous than the other three combined.
U.S.—The Biden campaign is facing a real communication problem as Joe Biden’s speeches are growing more and more nonsensical. In order to overcome this challenge, aides have hired an interpreter to translate everything he says into normal, human-style English.
“My fellow Americans, pickle hamster meatloaf. The thing. Potato!” Biden began.
“My fellow Americans, thank you for being here this evening,” the interpreter translated.
Biden continued: “This pandemic has cost us more than 85,000 jobs as of today. Lives of millions of people. Millions of people. Millions of jobs.” He then nodded at the translator to interpret that into something resembling plain English.
“Uh… the, uh, pandemic has cost us tens of millions of jobs, and 85,000 have tragically lost their lives,” she interpreted frantically.
But she struggled to keep up as his speech got less and less coherent.
“Peanut butter M&Ms and my fellow U.S. Americans in the Iraq. Platypus!” was translated as “We must make sure Donald Trump does not continue to rob America of its future,” while “Farley farley farley farley farley hufaaaaaaaar!” was translated as “I am the best choice to beat Donald Trump.”
As Biden’s speech concluded, he said farewell: “Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z’ nourrwringmm!”
“God bless you, and God bless America.”
My cmnt: As Biden walked out of the interview he caught sight of a pretty, young woman waving at him and said, ‘You’re a lying, dog-faced pony soldier.’ His interpreter quickly ran up to the woman and said, ‘He thinks you’re pretty and would like to sniff your hair.’
Live Stream Freezes After Joe Biden Says ‘over 120 Million Dead’ from Coronavirus
by Joshua Caplan – June 25, 2020 for Breitbart news
Former Vice President Joe Biden on Thursday falsely claimed that the Chinese coronavirus has killed a staggering 120 million people — just moments before a live stream of his remarks went dead.
“What people drastically underestimate is the impact on the medical health of people who, now, everything is complicated,” Biden told supporters during an event on health care in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. “Not only is the healthcare piece, but people don’t have a job, people don’t have anywhere to go. They don’t know what they’re going to do.”
“You have, unnecessarily, now we have over 120 million dead from COVID,” Biden added, right as the live stream appeared to glitch out. Biden’s image froze for over a minute, then the feed cut to a placeholder screen for the broadcaster, then resumed at a different venue for a prepared speech. It is unclear what, if any, correction Biden made for the inaccurate statistics.
To date, the United States has approximately 2.43 million confirmed coronavirus cases and 124,000 deaths, along with 747,000 recoveries, according to the COVID Tracking Project. Worldwide, nearly 9.5 million cases have been confirmed and 484,000 deaths, while 4.78 million have recovered.
This is not the first time Biden, known for his frequently verbal flubs, has given the incorrect figure on the number of coronavirus deaths. In May, the former vice president twice told MSNBC’s Morning Joe that 600,000 Americans have passed away from the disease. At the time, data showed that the U.S. had experienced a far smaller number of deaths, with 65,068 fatalities.
In the same interview, Biden appeared to forget the name of the Ebola virus.
“We led— Barack Obama led on the corona, I mean, excuse me, in the pandemic that occurred when we were in office. It was kept in Africa,” he told host Joe Scarborough.