Just wanted to note that I invented this pun in the 1960s when I was in high school. Since then it has been plagiarized multiple times by others. Another version is: If Lassie were depressed would she be melancholy?

“My melancholy is the most faithful mistress I have known; what wonder then that I love her in return.”

• Soren Kierkegaard, Either/Or: A Fragment of Life

Another lame pun from yours truly when he was in high school

It was probably the last day of my junior year in high school in Mr. Stephenson’s Social Studies class. We were just killing time to reach the required ‘x’ number of days of school attendance and so were playing a trivia game which involved the whole class.

As the hour wore on nobody was coming up with any new trivia questions. So I volunteered the following:

Back in the day of Alexander the Great